Who am I?
Who am I supposed to be? What purpose do I have in this world?
Am I an insignificant dot jotted down on the page of eternity, or am I something more?
Am I useful in this world, what can I do, what can I accomplish?
I have many directions and one destination. There are infinite roads and yet far fewer goals.
Which roads are false which should I not go down? They all look very similar at the start yet yield different endings. They intertwine like vines confusing me yet making it easier to find my way forward. Like water through weaving rivers I rush toward my goals. Yet doubts dam me like vines blocking my route along a road. I find myself trapped, confused, and at times alone.
Most of the time these dams have been placed by the same person taking the journey. Myself. Yet I don’t realize this and blame others. All the time not realizing I have the key. And I alone can release the flood gates on my own journey and continue toward my goals.
How do I determine what these goals are? Are they truly the goals I seek?
I seek a better life. I seek to be free. Free from the captivity of my own thinking.
How do I achieve this? Do I dare thrust myself down one of these paths? Do I dare journey into the unknown, with only a few vague glimpses of my future to guide me?
I must.
These roads are treacherous and deadly. They contain many pearls. The least of these are barbs that cut away at my soul, wearing me down, making me age inside, and out. Still I dare to venture down those paths into the unknown. Who knows what awaits me next?
Many things lie down paths of the mind. They hold mysterious beauties and jewels beyond imagination. These treasures of the mind reflect in the physical world and can be seen by others. They are unmistakable. I will carry them with me always. Unless through utter insanity I and they are lost, but even then there is hope. They are reflections of my journey and help me in what is to come.
In order to find these jewels I must take steps… steps on these roads of the unknown. With only my wits and mindset to guide me. I must journey never ceasing. For if I stop and look back for a moment I can already feel my feet sinking into obscurity and isolation.
Along the way there are lights to illuminate my path and help me to know which direction to take. But these lights can also distract from my true path and where I know I must go. Who is to know what lights are good and are trustworthy and which are leading me astray. Gut instinct prevails in these intertwining jungles of the mind knowing the path and taking it are one and the same. There is no turning back. Only left or right. The more time I spend looking at where I have gone the more I realize I have already ventured somewhere and who is to know where that is. Only I can know by looking forward and surveying what is to come.
No matter where I end up on this road no matter where my destination I know the journey will be wrought with adventure, passion, unknown joys, unknown sorrows, and many things I yet not know. But as long as I keep moving foreword I’m bound to discover these many things of the mind and of the journey we call life.
I am the journeyman and my trail is unknown to all.
January 31, 2009
Categories: Writing . . Author: thepunkmonk . Comments: 1 Comment